Looking In
by jacyevans
Summary: *COMPLETE* Draco is sent to Sunnydale to protect a certain witch who just helped defeat the First Evil and who has a VERY similar past. The two of them have an instant attraction...and are able to connect in a way neither thought was possible Willow/Draco
1. Same Song, Different Tune

A/N: Okay, if I work on ANY more fics, I'm going to go bonkers. Truly.  
  
This popped into my head while I was typing up the lyrics in the beginning of chapter five of "Die Another Day", and I haven't been able to get it out of my head since. So, here it is. This will be six parts, thanks to how my warped little imagination decided to work.  
  
All of the lyrics are from "Outside" by Staind.  
  
Pairing: Willow/Draco  
  
Disclaimer: Don't look at me. It aint'mine.  
  
~* Looking In *~  
  
Part One - Same Song, Different Tune  
  
~* And you bring me to my knees  
  
All this time that I  
  
All the times that I felt insecure  
  
And I leave my burdens at the door *~  
  
She was beautiful. She was, by far, the most graceful, beautiful creature he had ever seen.  
  
*This* was the witch who had tried to end the world a year ago? She must have been an angel, fallen from grace, because there was no way in hell that she was the one he was supposed to be watching over.  
  
Draco smirked. No way in hell. That was an irony in and of itself considering he was standing on the mouth of it. The same mouth that this witch had bound closed not once but twice. The same witch that had helped the slayer defeat the First Evil less then a week before, a feat that no one thought possible, especially the Watcher's Council, but they weren't around anymore now were they? Just seven watchers and a handful of slayers in training, not to mention two slayers already called. He had heard the story a hundred times from his boss. Sirius Black just wouldn't shut up about it, and now he knew why.  
  
Draco shook his head and began following the girl, a brunette walking casually next to her, remembering what Sirius had told him.  
  
"Draco, I need you to go to Sunnydale, California and guard the witch."  
  
"What?" Draco had expected a few things when he was called into Sirius' office, anything but this.  
  
"You heard me. She needs protection, and I know that you can offer it. You're about the only one who can."  
  
"What about Harry?"  
  
"On his honeymoon with Hermione. They'll be following you in a couple of days."  
  
"Ron?"  
  
"Already on a mission in Florence, but he'll get there eventually. Look, I know this is the last thing you want to do right now, but this girl - "Sirius looked at the paper the ministry had sent over, "Willow Rosenberg needs our protection. You're father's on a crusade for power, and he knows damn well that he can get enough from her to make him almost impossible to beat. Draco, I don't want to have to set you up against your father -"  
  
"I don't care about that Sirius. He disowned me long ago." Draco said, a mask of hatred on his face, the one he wore whenever his father's name was mentioned. Lucius killed his mother, right in front of him, when he discovered that Draco was playing both sides. And then he disowned him, saying that he would kill Draco himself unless the Dark Lord got to him first.  
  
Ah, yes. Old Voldemort. Another person Draco wished he would have had the chance to fight, but he knew better - that was Potter's fight, and for good reason. Dumbledore, Hagrid, Lupin - all dead because of Voldemort, and Draco had never seen Harry as determined as he was to end that fight as soon as it begun.  
  
Voldemort never had a chance. And now Lucius Malfoy was trying to fill the Dark Lord's shoes.  
  
It never ends, does it?  
  
Sirius sighed. "I know. I know. Same old song, you don't have to sing it again. But - Draco, I'm asking you. Go to Sunnydale, she needs our protection. I've already alerted the watcher, Rupert Giles, and he knows that you're coming, although he's not so thrilled about it."  
  
"Wonder why." Draco grumbled. He had heard all about old Ripper from his father. They were in the same demon-worshipping circle, but while Ethan and Rupert were caught and expelled, Lucius got away with it, and on top of that, Rupert was in love with an already betrothed Narcissa. Then Rupert went and became a watcher.  
  
The irony of it all.  
  
"Draco, he knows you're nothing like your father." Sirius said rubbing his eyes. "He's concerned. They just finished fighting the First Evil. There were casualties like you wouldn't believe, four of which were very personal, and on top of that, the slayer's more beat up then anyone. He said he's never seen her like this, and hopes never to see this again. The other slayer's in town, but she's shaken up. You're needed there."  
  
Draco sighed. "Alright, I'll go. What's the witch look like?"  
  
And so, now he was here, a photograph of Willow Rosenberg in his hand, and a small prayer that they would all get out of this alive.  
  
He'd seen enough death to last him a lifetime, and he was sure she had as well.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Willow was silent as she walked through the cemetery with Faith, three bouquets of flowers in her hand.  
  
"Willow?"  
  
Willow was snapped out of her stupor. "What? Oh, sorry Faith."  
  
Faith smiled a little. "You know, if you want to be alone, I could - "  
  
"No." Willow grabbed Faith's arm. "Please. I don't want to be alone."  
  
"That's okay. Neither do I."  
  
The two of them walked over to a set of newly dug graves, and Willow had to hold her breath so that the tears that threatened to fall wouldn't send her into another hysterical crying fit.  
  
Anya, Cordelia, Wesley - all gone. The LA gang heard what was going down, and Angel was in Sunnydale faster then a speeding bullet. And now, two of them were dead. Along with Anya.  
  
But nothing would compare to Buffy's reaction to it all when she saw Spike go down. She'd never forget seeing Buffy go completely still - and then go into a rage that could rival all rages. She killed every single one of the uber- vamps that had been sent to Sunnydale after she killed the first one with barely a scratch on her.  
  
And then she collapsed to the ground sobbing. If Angel hadn't been there, no one knew what she would have done. It was like they were watching her destroy the Master's bones again.  
  
Only this time, they hadn't all gotten out alive.  
  
Willow set down the flowers and sighed, turning towards Faith. "We should get back. Giles said there's someone coming that I have to meet."  
  
"Do you know what he's here for?"  
  
"Apparently, there's some big evil coming."  
  
Faith sighed. "Again?"  
  
"Unfortunately." Willow shook her head, holding back tears. "Let's get back; I want to see how Buffy's doing."  
  
The two of them walked out of the cemetery and towards Buffy's house, not aware of the shadow of a certain wizard following behind them.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Just knock Malfoy. She's going to come to the door eventually and see that you're here, so just knock."  
  
Draco held his breath and knocked, bracing himself to come face to face with the redheaded witch.  
  
Instead, he ended up facing a teenage girl. She was tall, just four or five inches shorter then him, with long brown hair and brown eyes.  
  
"Hi, can I help you?" Her voice was strained, and she looked absolutely exhausted, as if she hadn't slept in weeks. Then again, she probably hadn't.  
  
"Yes. I'm looking for Rupert Giles. He's expecting me."  
  
"Oh! You're - right, um - come in." Dawn opened the door and let Draco in.  
  
Dawn shut the door and looked out the window and then shook her head. "Force of habit." She grumbled. "Giles is upstairs with Buffy. He should be down in a minute or two."  
  
"Buffy? Oh - the slayer."  
  
"Yeah. My sister the slayer, that's her." She looked almost sorrowful. "Uh, the rest of the girls went out for a while with Xander, he's a friend of ours, so it's just us and Giles and Buffy. Faith and Willow stepped out just a few minutes ago. They should be back any second. You can sit down if you want - excuse the mess. We haven't had time to fix the window."  
  
"It's fine." Draco sat on the couch. "Faith. Is that the other slayer?"  
  
"Yeah." Dawn sat down next to him. "Can I ask you something?"  
  
"Uh - sure."  
  
"How much danger is Willow in?"  
  
Draco looked surprised.  
  
"Don't look so shocked. I'm not stupid. I knew there was something Giles wasn't telling us, especially considering he got a note from an owl. So, I asked him. And he told me everything. So, now I'm asking you - how bad is it?"  
  
Draco sighed. How was he supposed to tell a seventeen year old girl who had just survived an attack by the First Evil that Lucius could kill them all with two simple words and a wave of his wand?  
  
"That bad, huh?" Dawn said quietly.  
  
"Nothing compared to what you just defeated. Besides, this isn't your battle to fight. That's what I'm here for. There are two other people on their way, so I won't be alone." He smiled at her. "Don't worry about it....I didn't catch your name."  
  
Dawn nodded. "It's Dawn. And I'll try. Kinda hard when you've had pure evil after you for the past six months."  
  
"Dawn?" Giles stepped into the room and Draco stood up.  
  
"Mr. Giles?"  
  
Giles regarded the man standing before him for a few seconds. Draco looked exactly like his father, but he had his mother's eyes. He also lacked that "I'm better then you" stance Lucius always had, and he'd lost the slicked back look a few years before. Now, his blonde hair fell across his face, and Giles sighed.  
  
Definitely Narcissa's son.  
  
"Yes, you must be Draco Malfoy." Giles said shaking his hand.  
  
"I'm sorry to come at such a bad time, but - "  
  
"Yes, I've heard all about it from Mr. Black. Willow should be here any - "  
  
"Giles!"  
  
"That would be her - Dawn, go tell Faith to go upstairs with you and see Buffy."  
  
"But - "  
  
"Dawn." Giles said firmly.  
  
"Fine." Dawn grumbled.  
  
Willow came into the room, stake in hand, breathless. "The vamps are back in action a-" She cut herself off when she saw Draco. Her breath caught slightly in her throat.  
  
Draco Malfoy was *gorgeous*. He reminded her a little of Spike, but - Goddess, he was just beautiful.  
  
"Hi, um, I'm Willow."  
  
Her voice sounded sweet to his ears, and as he shook her hand, he looked into her eyes. They were distant, as if she was holding back from a past that had gone horribly wrong, and now felt insecure and out of place among those she was closest to. Just like him.  
  
"Draco."  
  
As Willow shook his hand, she felt a sudden rush of power that faded quickly, and she looked up into his eyes. He was strong, but his power seemed to come with a fairly large amount of baggage attached that he just wanted to leave behind. His aura hummed with magic, both dark and light, as if he were caught in a web between one and the other. Just like her.  
  
It was the same old story with a different tune.  
  
This battle, whoever it was against and whatever it had to do with her, wasn't going to be the usual black and white good versus evil. This was one fight caught in the middle as shade of grey. 


	2. Dancing on the Edge

~* Looking In *~  
  
Part Two - Dancing on the Edge  
  
~* I'm on the outside  
  
I'm looking in  
  
I can see through you  
  
I see your true colors  
  
Inside you're ugly  
  
Ugly like me  
  
I can see through you  
  
I see to the real you *~  
  
Willow sat on the edge of the bed brushing her hair. Draco told her everything - how his father was after her because he knew she had power, how he was here to protect her. Willow just nodded, still getting over the connection she had made with him. It was like her soul was reaching out to him.  
  
She hated to admit it, but she was deeply attracted to him. Now she knew how Buffy and Angel must have felt.  
  
"Willow?"  
  
Buffy opened the door and smiled.  
  
"Buffy, you shouldn't be out of bed."  
  
Buffy laughed and then winced. "Bed, schmed. I'm the slayer - I need to move around for a while, or I'll go insane."  
  
"Angel refuses to leave?"  
  
Buffy grimaced playfully. "Angel? Leave? Not looking like a possibility any time soon." She smiled painfully. "Too bad it took something like this for him to stay with me."  
  
"Buffy - look, he's here now. Make the most of it."  
  
"Wish I could." She said smiling.  
  
"Buffy!" Willow said shocked.  
  
"What? Did you forget - as Cordelia said once, we suffer, we fight, that's business as usual. We get groiny with one another, and the world as we know it falls apart. That and I can barely walk, much less do anything else."  
  
Willow nodded. "This is true."  
  
"So, who's the hottie that I saw come upstairs before?"  
  
"Is that all you ever think about?" Willow asked.  
  
"Oh, lay off it Will, I saw how you were looking at him. He *is* cute."  
  
"That he is." There was a knock on the door and Willow smiled. "You can come in Draco."  
  
Draco had been listening to their conversation through the door, smiling. He liked this Buffy - and Willow thought he was cute, did she? The feeling was mutual. He took a deep breath and stepped into the room. And that's when he saw her, the slayer. Sirius was right - she was beaten up pretty badly. There were cuts and bruises all over her face, and her right wrist was swollen and looked sprained, not to mention the cuts on both of her hands. There was a bandage across her left side right below her ribs and her weight was leaning painfully off of her right leg. Through the white tank top she wore, he could see cuts all across her back.  
  
The last person he had seen *that* beat up was Harry after what was appropriately called "The Final Battle". And he had magic to help him heal.  
  
He would talk to a certain Ms. Granger - no, wait, Mrs. Potter, he thought smirking - about some healing charms when she arrived in a few days.  
  
"You must be Buffy."  
  
"Yup. That's me. And you must be Draco Malfoy." She tried to stand and ended up not getting anywhere. She let out a frustrated sigh. "Hang on." She pushed herself to a standing position with one arm and leaned her weight onto her leg, almost falling. Draco caught her.  
  
"Okay, that didn't work very well." Buffy smiled at Draco sheepishly. "Sorry. I'm not usually this clumsy, but as I'm sure you've heard, the big bad has been keeping us pretty damn busy lately."  
  
"So I've heard."  
  
"Buffy?"  
  
Buffy groaned. "And that would be my cue to leave." She sighed. "Nice meeting you Draco. Willow, I'll talk to you later."  
  
"Night Buffy." Willow said, shutting the door behind her.  
  
Willow eyed Draco and her eyes flashed towards the bed. The sleeping arrangements had been *very* crazy lately. Tonight, Buffy and Angel were in Buffy's room. No one was about to argue with an already cranky slayer about that one, and Angel flat-out refused to leave her side anyway. Dawn had six of the twelve remaining trainees in her room, and Giles was in the guest room. The other six trainees were downstairs with Xander and Faith, and no one was even going to begin to think about what they were going to do once Draco's friends arrived.  
  
This left Draco and Willow in Willow's room. Alone, for now at least.  
  
"Why don't you take the bed." Willow said. "I can take the floor."  
  
"From what I've heard, you've been on the floor for the last six months. I don't bite. It's a big bed. We can both sleep up there." 'Yeah Malfoy, make the tension worse why don't you.'  
  
Willow bit her lip. 'You refused Kennedy's offer about a thousand and one times. Why can't you say no to this one guy? Cause you're attracted to him - oh, screw it Rosenberg.' "Okay, whatever."  
  
Willow sat down on the bed, still not used to being able to go to sleep at night without any major worries. Draco sat down next to her.  
  
There was silence.  
  
Draco just looked at her. She was putting her hair up in a ponytail, and he just couldn't stop watching her. He knew that he shouldn't, knew that it would just make things harder on the situation, but he couldn't help himself.  
  
Willow looked up and saw Draco regarding her. His eyes were so intense, it made him look even more attractive them he already was. It was obvious he knew at least part of her past, and Giles had filled her in on most of his. He was just like her - he stepped into the dark, and was pulled out by the most unlikely source of light. Just like her, he felt like an outsider.  
  
And just like him, she wanted nothing more then to make the mistake of getting involved with him.  
  
Draco leaned in and Willow tilted her head, capturing his mouth in a kiss that could rival any that she had ever had. This wasn't like it ever was with Oz or even Tara. There were sparks dancing across her mind, and she felt connected to him somehow. This just felt right.  
  
Willow was the first to pull away. "That was unexpected." She said softly.  
  
"You're telling me."  
  
She looked into his eyes. She wanted so much more then that one kiss. She wanted *him* like she had never wanted anyone before. They had only known each other for a few hours, but it seemed like so much longer.  
  
And from the hungry look in his eyes, she could tell he wanted the same thing.  
  
Willow got up and went over to the door, locking it. She turned around and was swept into a kiss that took her breath away and made her feel like she was on fire.  
  
Draco pulled Willow as close to him as humanly possible. He swept his tongue over her lips, begging entrance, of which she gave right away. Her tongue dueled with his and her hands danced up and down his arms and shoulders. He had never felt like this about anyone before, not Ginny, not even Hermione, both of whom he had fallen madly in love with. This was desire in its rawest form, fueled by an attraction that was amazingly powerful.  
  
Draco pulled her nightshirt up over her head and she unbuckled his pants, slipping them down his legs. She pulled his tee shirt off and ran a hand down his chest, loving the feeling of her palm against his skin.  
  
The rest of their clothes were off in record time and the last coherent thought that flitted through either of their minds was 'This is right.'  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Willow was lying awake, trying to make some sort of sense of what had just happened. The uneven rise and fall of Draco's chest against her back told her that he wasn't sleeping either.  
  
Willow sighed and rolled over so that she could look into Draco's eyes. He smiled slightly and brushed a piece of hair out of her face.  
  
Willow searched his face for some sort of explanation, anything that might help her figure out why she was feeling so connected to him.  
  
Bracing herself, she asked him, "Do you feel it?"  
  
"Feel what?"  
  
Willow sighed and shook her head. "Never mind." She leaned her head into the crook of his neck and fell asleep. Draco followed soon after.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Draco!"  
  
Draco was standing with his back to the battle that was waging behind him. He walked away from it all, not wanting to see it, yet wanting to be a part of it. The Dark Mark burned so fiercely on his skin that he all but cringed under the pain. The lure of the dark was too strong. He hadn't been able to fight it then, and he couldn't fight it now.  
  
"Draco!"  
  
Draco felt a hand on his shoulder spin him around. Even with all the evil coursing through him, he knew that she shouldn't be here. She couldn't be.  
  
Hermione's face was etched with pain and concern. He knew she had just been on the receiving end of a particularly painful Cruciatus Curse. Hell, *he* had been the one who sent it her way. She was barely standing straight, and there was a nasty cut over her right eye.  
  
"Hermione, I'm not in the mood for your bullshit. Get out of here before I have to do something I'm going to regret." His every word was laced with malice and threat. Was this really the person she had gotten to know so well their sixth year, the same person that had helped Harry and Ron get out of a detention with Snape? The same person she had fallen in love with, even though she now loved someone else?  
  
"Draco, please, don't do this."  
  
Draco laughed at her. "Don't do what? Please don't tell me you bought that 'I'm on the good side' bullshit I was throwing at you. You know just as well as everyone else that it wasn't true." His words were cutting, and it hurt to hear them, but Hermione wasn't about to back down.  
  
"You know that's a lie. I know that's a lie. You were on our side, and you made a mistake. Everybody does. But you have to come back to us before it's too late."  
  
"Come back to us? Come back to you, you mean. You could never accept the fact that I was going towards 'the dark side', my father's side, nobody ever could. Don't lecture me about lying because you lied just as much as anyone else to me."  
  
Hermione slapped him. "Bullshit Malfoy! You're lying to yourself, and you know it!"  
  
Draco grabbed her arm and knocked her to the ground. Pain rose through her left arm and she winced against it. She wasn't going to back down.  
  
"I love you." She said, the words clear and strong. "I love you, and I know somewhere, you love me too."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
"What, the truth hurt Malfoy?" She said gently. "I - "  
  
"SHUT UP!" Draco tackled Hermione to the ground and pinned her under him. He didn't know what was running through his mind as he held her underneath him.  
  
Except he didn't want to hurt her.  
  
His grip on her arm loosened enough for her to get her left arm free. She let her fingertip graze over the Dark Mark lightly. "You know this isn't what you want. I don't know what your father told you to get you to change your mind, and I'm sorry if it was something I did that made you listen."  
  
He just looked at her. Hermione knew better then anyone else that Draco had been considering joining forces with his father for about a month before he finally gave in, and she also knew that it was her breaking up with him that finally drove him over that edge he had been dancing on for far too long. She wished she could take it back. But she finally realized that she loved him, but not in the way that she loved someone else. And somewhere, deep down under all the darkness and the rage, he realized it too.  
  
Draco rolled off of her and stood up. He offered her a hand and she stood up, keeping her eyes firmly locked on his as she said. "I love you."  
  
He nodded, the fury finally fading, slowly but surely. It was hard to turn away from that darkness that still threatened to overcome him, but he was going to fight it now. He knew she could help.  
  
"I know."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Willow stood in front of the idol, chanting in Latin. Black power coursed from the statue into her when Xander suddenly appeared, blocking the idol from her view, breaking her contact with it.  
  
"Hey, black-eyed girl..."  
  
The glowing on the idol faded, though not completely. The energy dissipated.  
  
Xander continued. "Whatcha doin'?"  
  
Willow blinked her eyes open, revealing them to be their normal green again, as she looked at him, incredulously. "Get out of here."  
  
"You're not the only one with powers, you know. You may be a hopped up uber- witch, but this carpenter can dry-wall you into the next century."  
  
"I'm not joking, Xander. Get out of my way. Now." Willow gestured and Xander was suddenly thrown back, slamming painfully against the base of the statue, with bone cracking force. Willow's brow furrowed, as a look of remorse crossed her face. In full glow again, black energy streamed into the idol from Willow. The scorched earth spread wider around her. Her eyes were black, once again, and back to work, focusing on the statue.  
  
Another tremor struck.  
  
Xander, on the ground, stirred, holding his chest. No doubt he cracked a couple of ribs. But he rose, breaking the connection between Willow and the idol once again.  
  
"You can't stop this." Willow said threateningly.  
  
"Yeah, I get that. It's just - where else am I going to go? You've been my best friend my whole life. World gonna end - where else would I want to be?"  
  
"Is this the master plan?" Willow sneered. "You're going to stop me by telling me you  
  
love me? "  
  
"Well, I was going to walk you off a cliff and hand you an anvil, but it seemed kinda cartoony."  
  
"Still making jokes." She said, sounding almost bored.  
  
"I'm not joking. I know you're in pain. I can't imagine the pain you're in. I know you're about to do something apocalyptically evil and stupid and hey, still want to hang. You're Willow."  
  
Willow glared. "Don't call me th- "  
  
Xander cut her off. "First day of kindergarten you cried 'cause you broke the yellow crayon and you were too afraid to tell anyone. You've come pretty far, ending the world, not a terrific notion but the thing is, yeah. I love you. I loved crayon-breaky Willow and I love scary veiny Willow. So if I'm going out, it's here. You wanna kill the world you start with me. I've earned that."  
  
"You think I won't?  
  
"It doesn't matter. I'll still love you."  
  
"Shut up." Willow said furiously, making a slashing motion in the air. Xander stopped as three large cuts opened on his face, as if he scratched them there. He winced, touched the blood on his face and looked at it, then at her.  
  
"I love you."  
  
She slashed at him again. Xander's shirt tore at the shoulder as larger, deeper wounds appeared. He almost doubled over from the pain. But, again, he looked at her.  
  
"I love-" She cut him off with a blast of energy, knocking him down. She looked at him, her face etched with sorrow. Xander picked himself up, catching his breath, staring up at her again. He began to stagger toward her. "I............ love you."  
  
"Shut up!" Willow blasted him again. He grunted at the impact, but this time, he didn't go down, as if her assault had lost some of its strength.  
  
"I love you, Willow."  
  
Willow began to cry. "Stop............" She sent another BLAST, but he barely registered it when it hit him. He kept coming.  
  
"I love you."  
  
He reached her and she started to hit him, with her fists, shaking her head. He withstood her blows, but on his injured body, they still inflicted pain.  
  
Willow fell to her knees, sobbing. Her hands over her eyes, her black hair suddenly went back to its normal red. Xander gently put a hand on her shoulder, softly saying, "I love you."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Willow woke up gasping for breath. She sat up and clutched the sheet to her chest. She realized she was sweating, and it was pretty hard not to be after the dream she had just had.  
  
It was of him. Draco. His fall into the darkness. His being pulled out. She understood his reasons, understood everything. His past was so comparable to hers, it was scary.  
  
Draco awoke with a start and looked over to see Willow wide awake, looking at him.  
  
He sat up and reached over, putting a hand on her shoulder.  
  
"You saw it too didn't you?" She asked, looking at him.  
  
He had heard the story a million times, how she had fallen over the edge after her lover was killed, how her best friend, a normal Muggle, was able to pull her back again.  
  
It was completely different actually seeing it.  
  
"Yes. I did." Considering she was asking, he could only imagine that she saw his part in the Final Battle, his argument with Hermione, and how it all turned out. He was ashamed that he had ever hurt Hermione that much, and could only imagine how she felt knowing that she had hurt her best friend.  
  
It was an ugly past, but he knew that hers was just as ugly. He knew she would understand. He could see through her just as well as she could see through him.  
  
And he knew that he could trust her.  
  
Draco pulled Willow against his chest and she leaned into him, closing her eyes.  
  
"Let me tell you a story." He said.  
  
She looked up at him. "And then I can tell you mine."  
  
Draco smiled slightly and sealed his mouth over hers.  
  
Willow finally understood what having a soul mate truly meant. 


	3. Simple No Longer

~* Looking In *~  
  
Part Three - Simple No Longer  
  
~* All this time that I felt like this won't end  
  
Was for you  
  
And I taste what I could never have  
  
It's from you  
  
All those times that I tried  
  
My intentions  
  
Full of pride  
  
And I waste more time than anyone *~  
  
Draco awoke to the sound of banging and running feet. He rubbed his eyes and looked over at Willow, who was sleeping peacefully, one hand on his chest. He didn't want to wake her. They had gotten to sleep pretty late as it was, and they were up until long after sunrise talking. If the clock told him the truth, they had only been asleep about an hour.  
  
And if *he* was exhausted, he couldn't even imagine how she was feeling.  
  
A hand sliding down his arm caught his attention and he looked down to see Willow smiling up at him.  
  
"Morning." She said lazily.  
  
"Morning. I didn't want to wake you, but there's a bit of a commotion outside, and I thought something was wrong."  
  
The last reaction he was expecting was the one he received. Willow started giggling madly.  
  
"What? Is there something on my face?" He asked, smiling at her.  
  
She giggled. "No, it's just - it's *always* this crazy in the morning. There's one bathroom in this house."  
  
Draco still looked confused.  
  
Willow sat up, still giggling, and put a hand on his cheek. "One bathroom, sixteen girls, and now four guys."  
  
"Ah. So it's a fight for the shower, is it?"  
  
"Yeah. Buffy and I always end up going last. Somehow, Dawn has learned to get up before everyone else and get in first, followed shortly by Kennedy. They've gotten pretty close."  
  
"So, how long have you all been here together?"  
  
Willow looked up and counted in her head. "Six months. The SIT's - "  
  
"The who?"  
  
"Slayers in training."  
  
"Oh." This was still all *very* new to him. Head Boy of his house, you would think he could remember the names of twelve teenage girls.  
  
Apparently not.  
  
"Yeah, so they've come slowly but surely, and we've lost some along the way. Actually, at one point, there were seventeen trainees, plus ten other people. It got pretty crazy around here for a while, but it's died down. I still haven't been able to sleep very well though."  
  
"You didn't seem like you wanted to sleep last night." Draco said suggestively, kissing her neck.  
  
Willow blushed slightly. "Yeah, well, somebody was keeping me awake." She leaned a little closer to him.  
  
"And you're complaining?" A little closer.  
  
"No." She sealed his mouth over his.  
  
The two of them sat there, necking shamelessly like two teenagers in the Astronomy Tower, when a knock on their door yanked them out of their pleasure.  
  
Willow groaned and Draco had to stifle a laugh at the look on her face. Willow glared at him. "What do you want?"  
  
"It's me, Will." Dawn said through the door. "Look, there are two people downstairs claiming they know Draco. I was hoping he could come down. Is he awake?"  
  
Willow looked at Draco and smiled. "Yeah, he's awake. I'll send him down in a minute."  
  
"Got it."  
  
Willow heard her feet move away from the door and sighed. She looked over at Draco. "As much as I'd love to stay here with you all day, I think you have to go see who that is. We've been a little cautious around here lately. Sorry if it all seems a bit overwhelming."  
  
"You've obviously never been at Hogwarts after Voldemort attacked."  
  
Willow shook her head and went over to her dresser, pulling out clothes. She had the sheet wrapped around her, and moved around a bit uncomfortably trying to change. Draco watched her, amused. "What's it like there? Hogwarts? I mean, I schooled myself in magic, at least for the most part. It has to be amazing there."  
  
"Oh, it's not that amazing." Willow threw him a look over a shoulder as if to say 'well, maybe not to you.' Draco arched an eyebrow and laughed. "Then again, I guess I did grow up in the wizarding world. Nothing about it amazes me anymore."  
  
Willow finished changing and threw the sheet back onto the bed, sighing. "I'm going to go see if Buffy's awake, okay?" She gave him a quick kiss.  
  
"Alright." He said against her lips.  
  
She pulled away, and went to open the door, before turning back. "Are we going to tell anyone? About us I mean?"  
  
Draco sighed. "I was never one for keeping secrets - you can ask Hermione all about that." Hermione insisted on keeping their relationship from Harry and Ron for weeks before he got so frustrated that he told them himself. "But, if you want to -"  
  
"No!" She said quickly, and then smiled awkwardly at the look on his face. "I mean, no, I - I don't want to. Okay?"  
  
Draco smiled slyly. "Of course."  
  
Willow shook her head and walked out, closing the door behind her. She let out a little yelp of surprise when she saw Buffy standing there.  
  
"Buffy! Goddess, don't do that!"  
  
Buffy grinned. "Sorry. Angel's stealth must be rubbing off on me. And what, praytell, were we doing with a certain wizard last night?" She winked playfully.  
  
Willow grinned. "Oh, but whatever do you mean?"  
  
"Someone got smoochies. Tell me you got smoochies."  
  
"I got smoochies." She arched her eyebrows. "And a little more."  
  
Buffy squealed with delight. "You have to tell me *all* about it later. Right now, I have to go downstairs and see what the calvary is raving about. Draco's coming down too, right?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Good. They'd better be who they say they are, because I'm in no mood to deal with imposters." Buffy stopped for a second. "That would sound more threatening if I wasn't limping wouldn't it?"  
  
"Sadly yes."  
  
"Eh - I'll get over it." The two of them walked down the stairs, Buffy a bit slowly, to her resentment, and walked into the livingroom. There were two people sitting on the couch side by side. The man was tall with unkempt black hair and amazing green eyes. The woman sitting next to him was about six inches shorter, wavy brown hair, and brown eyes. Willow could only gather that they were married from the gold band on both of their left hands.  
  
The woman looked up when Willow entered the room. Buffy went into the kitchen to get a much needed cup of coffee. "You must be Willow. I'm Hermione Granger, and this is Harry Potter. We're friends of Draco's."  
  
"I figured as much. Draco will be down in a second. I think he's changing."  
  
"Or possibly attempting to get into the bath - "Buffy stopped when she saw Hermione. "room." She shook her head a few times. "I'm sorry - you - do I know you from somewhere?"  
  
Hermione looked at Buffy intently, and shook her head. Then it finally hit her. "Yes! Um - Watcher's Council. Last year. A Quentin Travers wanted me to start training, but I declined. I'm a bit satisfied with my present job. What were you doing there?"  
  
"Attempting to convince a very stubborn Travers that the First Evil was coming after me, but I'm sure you know that story. After all, what do I know? I've only been the slayer for the past eight years and sure, I've died a few times, but it wasn't *my* fault, and I'm going to stop while I'm ahead."  
  
Harry just looked at her. "You died?"  
  
"Twice."  
  
Harry looked up into the doorway, where Malfoy was leaning against the doorframe. He smiled at Willow who smiled back. "Hello Potter."  
  
"Malfoy." Was all Harry said.  
  
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Oh honestly, you two are worse then five year olds." She went over to Draco and gave him a friendly hug. "Hello Draco."  
  
"Hi 'Mione." He whispered near her ear. "So, how was the honeymoon?" Hermione hit him playfully on the arm and just arched an eyebrow suggestively.  
  
"So, where's Weasly?" Draco asked as Hermione went to sit back down next to Harry.  
  
"On his way. He had to stop in and talk to Sirius. Said something unexpected happened in Florence that had to be taken care of, though I have no idea what it could have been."  
  
"Something unexpected *always* happens." Hermione said sighing.  
  
"You don't have to remind me." Draco said.  
  
"Look, I don't mean to interrupt," Buffy said, seeing Faith and Xander come down the stairs out of the corner of her eye. "Obviously you guys have some catching up to do, but - are you planning on staying overnight?"  
  
"Just for a few days." Harry said. "Ron will probably be staying as well when he gets here." Buffy groaned. "Why? Is there a problem?"  
  
"Let me put it this way." Faith said, coming into the room. "Four bedrooms, one bathroom, seventeen girls, six guys. That answer your question?"  
  
Hermione grimaced, as if understanding completely. "That does present a problem."  
  
"Well, we're just going to have to move things around. If Angel and I sleep in my bed - "  
  
Xander coughed, though it sounded a lot like "gypsy curse". Buffy glared. "If Angel and I take the bed, there's room for about four more people on the floor."  
  
"What about Willow's room? Ow!" Faith and Buffy elbowed him. That was exactly what they were trying to avoid. Buffy explained to Faith what was going on between Willow and Draco, and she was more then happy to attempt to keep them alone in a room together.  
  
Damn Xander and his big mouth.  
  
"I have to agree with Xander." Giles said, crossing his arms. "Buffy, you need your rest. You don't need anyone else in your room. I've already offered to take a few of the girls off of Xander and Dawn's hands. If they don't mind the floor, Harry, Hermione, and Ron could easily fit in Willow's room."  
  
At this point, Willow and Draco were eyeing each other. Faith was glaring at Xander as if to say 'don't sleep tonight.' Xander recoiled.  
  
Willow sighed. "Sure, whatever."  
  
"Will, are you sure?" Buffy asked.  
  
"It's fine. I'm going to the store; we're running out of food. Anyone who wants to come is welcome to. Otherwise, I'll see everyone in about an hour."  
  
Willow grabbed her coat from next to the door and walked out. Draco was about to follow, but Hermione stopped him. "Let someone else go. I want to talk to you."  
  
Draco gave her an exasperated look. "Hermione - "  
  
"Don't argue with me, Draco." She gave Harry a quick kiss, and opened the door. "Let's take a walk, shall we?"  
  
Draco nodded, and walked out after her. Faith grabbed Xander's arm. "C'mon Xand. We're taking walk."  
  
"But I don't want to take a walk." Xander protested.  
  
Faith pushed him out the door. "Tough. I'll explain on the way."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Hermione and Draco walked in silence for a few blocks. Hermione turned to him. "So, you want to tell me what's going on between you and Willow?"  
  
"What makes you think there's something going on?" Draco said, looking down.  
  
"Oh, come off it, Draco. I know you better then most people give me credit. I saw the way you were looking at her, and I know what that look means because I've seen it before. So don't think you're fooling me, because you're not."  
  
Draco sighed. "She understands me, Hermione. Better then anyone ever has. She knows how I feel because she's been there. She knows what it's like to be acting on pure, proud instinct, to try and have something you know you can never have, because you're not supposed to. She knows me in a way that nobody else ever has. Or ever will."  
  
Hermione nodded. "So, let me guess. There was an immediate attraction, followed by a short explanation from someone else, probably Mr. Giles, about both of your pasts. You were put in the same room, alone I might add, so that attraction was just ten times stronger, you probably had sex, had some telling revelation about each other, and then stayed up until dawn talking." She looked up at him. "How am I doing so far?"  
  
Draco blinked. "You're better at this then Trelawney ever gave you credit for, did you know that?"  
  
Hermione slipped her arm through his, smiling. "I try."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Will! Wait up!"  
  
Willow turned around when she saw Faith and Xander running to catch up with her. She smiled. "So, you decided to join the food brigade?"  
  
"Food is good. And I always was part of the snack brigade back in high school, so I figured, why stop now." Xander said innocently.  
  
"You wanted to know about Draco and me, so you followed me while I was alone."  
  
"That too." Xander said shrugging.  
  
"Look, I got some of the story from B. I just want to know the rest. From you."  
  
"And me, being your best friend and all, would like to know more about the guy you've fallen for after twenty-four hours."  
  
"It's not that simple." Willow said. "And 'fallen for' is saying it likely. It's more then that. It's a connection I've never had with anyone. Not Oz, not Tara. I feel so...complete when I'm with him. I can't explain it. He knows what I've been through because he's been there, and I know that if I tell him about my past, he won't judge me. He knows what it's like to end up in a really dark place, and to be pulled back again, and all the steps in between. He knows what it's like to feel like the world is going to end, but that aching sadness is going to go on forever. He's tasted darkness, just like I have. And he knows how hard it is to return to any sense of normalcy."  
  
"So, I'm guessing you two know everything about each other then?" Faith said.  
  
Willow was confused. "I don't know what you mean."  
  
"Well, there was an instant attraction, followed by a quick explanation from Giles. The two of you were in your room alone together, so you probably did the naughty, and then stayed up all night talking." She grinned at Willow and Xander's shocked faces. "Am I right?"  
  
Willow just stared at her. "That's scary. Did anyone ever tell you that you're scary?"  
  
"You mean besides Xander?"  
  
"Hey!"  
  
Willow laughed.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Buffy was sitting in the livingroom with Harry. Angel was downstairs with Giles training with Dawn and the SIT's and no one else had returned from their walks yet.  
  
"So, what's up with you and Draco?" Buffy asked, trying to relieve the silence. "You two don't seem to like each other very much.  
  
Harry snorted. "That's an understatement. This is civil compared to how we used to be."  
  
"You two must have really hated each other."  
  
"Let's just put it this way - we were in rival houses in school - "  
  
"Houses?"  
  
"Oh, right - When you first get to Hogwarts, you're sorted into a house. There are four of them. Me, Hermione, and Ron were in Gryffindor, and Malfoy was in Slytherin."  
  
"Oh. But Hermione seems to get along with him well enough."  
  
"Hermione and Draco dated for a little over a year. She broke up with him, he joined his father on the enemy side, but that was the least of our problems, because the world was pretty much going to hell."  
  
"That sounds vaguely familiar." Buffy said, leaning back into the couch cushion.  
  
"Does it?"  
  
"Sunnydale is on the Hellmouth, so we're prone to problems of the apocalyptic kind. That and the whole breaking up with boyfriend and him joining the enemy while the world goes to hell strikes a little close to home."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
Buffy looked at the clock. "How much time do you have?"  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because if I tell you my story, then you have to tell me yours, and we are so going to be here a while."  
  
Harry nodded. "I have time." 


	4. Dark Destiny

A/N: Character death in this chapter. Just one. Sorry....  
  
~* Looking In *~  
  
Part Four - Dark Destiny  
  
~* I'm on the outside  
  
I'm looking in  
  
I can see through you  
  
I see your true colors  
  
Cause inside you're ugly  
  
Ugly like me  
  
I can see through you  
  
I see to the real you *~  
  
"Wow. So - you've - wow."  
  
Buffy smiled. "To say the very least. But your life hasn't been any picnic in the park either."  
  
"That it hasn't. But it's gotten better, or at least better then it was."  
  
Buffy sighed softly. "I wish mine had."  
  
"What was that?"  
  
Buffy shook her head. "Nothing. Nothing, never mind." Harry - well, she could identify with him. He was the boy with the destiny, the one whose purpose in life was to do something great. And great he was - known for defeating the darkest wizard in wizardville, or something like that. He was the Boy Who Lived, and she was the Girl Who Died. Twice.  
  
They were exactly the same and completely different all at the same time. Who knew?  
  
"Buffy?"  
  
Buffy's attention was pulled out of her thoughts and towards the doorway. "Yeah. Angel, what is it?"  
  
"We have a - " Angel was cut off by a sudden swooshing noise in the room as an owl flew in the door, along with Hermione and a very relaxed Draco. It flew onto Harry's shoulder and nipped his shoulder lightly.  
  
"What is up with the owls?"  
  
Harry chuckled. "It's how we deliver mail. This is my owl, Hedwig." Hedwig nipped his ear, a little harder this time.  
  
"Okay, okay. I'll open it. Give me a minute." Harry couldn't open the letter fast enough. Whatever this was about, it was important, considering Hedwig was now flying around the room, not much unlike Pigwidgeon used to.  
  
"Potter, what's with your owl?" Draco said, annoyed, ducking as Hedwig flew over his head.  
  
Harry's face went slightly pale. "It might have something to do with this." Harry handed the letter to Buffy, who eyed him suspiciously before reading it aloud. Hermione went over to Harry's side and he just shook his head.  
  
Harry,  
  
I just arrived in Sunnydale to a welcoming committee. Get down to the high school NOW. There's been an attack, but there's something you have to see to believe. I would suggest bringing the slayer with you. There's something she needs to know about as well.  
  
- Ron  
  
Buffy didn't have to think twice. She grabbed a stake from the coffee table, and looked around. "Am I the only one going, or is someone going to have my back?"  
  
"Buffy, its still daylight." Angel said.  
  
"Then come when it's dark." She was about to step out the door, and Angel grabbed her arm.  
  
"Don't try to stop me! I'm going!"  
  
"Wait a minute! There's something you should know."  
  
"What?" Buffy saw the worry in his face. "Angel..."  
  
"It's Kennedy. She's been called."  
  
"What?" Buffy shook her head. "That's impossible, the only way she could have been called is if - "  
  
"Exactly."  
  
Buffy just looked at him, the contents of the letter finally making sense.  
  
I would suggest bringing the slayer with you. There's something she needs to know about as well.  
  
"Oh my god - Faith."  
  
"Exactly. If Faith's dead, the last thing you should be doing is going in, guns blazing."  
  
"Could we discuss this later people?" Draco said, impatiently. If the other slayer was dead, he didn't even want to start thinking about what happened to Willow. "Are you coming or not?"  
  
Buffy looked at Angel, and shrugged. "I'm going."  
  
"Good. We can apparate - "  
  
"What?" Angel and Buffy asked together.  
  
"Apparate - it's a way to get from one place to another by merely thinking about it. It's pretty simple."  
  
Buffy just looked at him, blinking. "Simple he says."  
  
Draco glared and grabbed Buffy's arm. "Hold on."  
  
The world shifted, and the last thing Buffy saw in her house was Angel's worried face.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
"Weasly!"  
  
Ron spun around. Only one person would call him that and be able to express that much annoyance with him in just one word. "Where the bloody hell have you been Malfoy?"  
  
"Trying to get the slayer here to choose whether she wanted to stay or go. A little indecisive she is."  
  
"Oh, fuck off Draco."  
  
"And what a mouth. I suddenly have a newfound respect for you Summers."  
  
Buffy ignored him. "Where's Willow?"  
  
"She's a little shaken up right now. She said she wanted to be alone. I wasn't quite in any position to argue."  
  
"Where is she?" Draco asked.  
  
Ron made a gesture with his hand. "Over around the back of the school."  
  
Hermione saw the stricken look in Draco's face, and knew exactly what he planned on doing. And she was going to help.  
  
"Ron, what happened?" She asked quickly, trying to distract him. "What did you mean by welcoming committee?" As she spoke, Draco slipped behind them and around the school to where Willow was.  
  
"What happened? That's a story to be told. The abridged version? Someone must have put a Honing Charm on me and Lavender and followed us here. We got here, and saw Willow, and two other people - Xander and - "  
  
"Xander! Where is he? Is he okay?"  
  
"Xander is fine. He's sitting with - erm - with Faith." He said, slowly. "Buffy, I'm so - "  
  
"Where is he?" She asked sternly, feeling the tears well up in her throat.  
  
"Over there. By the main entrance." Buffy nodded and walked over to him.  
  
"Xander?" Buffy asked tentatively.  
  
Xander looked up at her. "She was just fighting these - and then - there was a bunch of green light - she was - Willow - oh God, Buffy." Buffy went over and hugged him, eyes closed.  
  
"I can't do this anymore."  
  
"I know Xand. I know."  
  
Willow was watching her friends out of the corner of her eye, holding back tears. She felt Draco approaching her. "I thought I told Ron I wanted to be alone."  
  
"Willow, this wasn't your fault."  
  
Willow spun around to face him. Her eyes were a deeper green then usual, as if they were fading from a darker color. He could feel the magic rolling off of her in waves, not dangerously, but enough to tell him that she had used it recently.  
  
"What happened?" He approached her cautiously. "Whatever it was - "  
  
"How can you say it wasn't my fault? You weren't there - you don't know! We were just talking, and then these two people showed up. They said their names were Ron and Lavender, and they said they were with you. And then there were these guys in hoods. Dozens of them surrounding us, and I could just feel the darkness, and I knew they were bad. Ron seemed to panic, and then - they just attacked. Faith was holding them off but then one of them - the leader - said something. And there was all this green light. Xander was thrown back, and I saw he was hurt. And she was just dead."  
  
"Willow -"  
  
The tears were steadily rolling down her cheeks. "And he said that would happen to all of us if I didn't go with him. And then - I lost it. Completely. I felt the magic in me and I just let it take over, and he was pleased. The rest of them panicked and backed off, some of them disappeared. And all I wanted to do was hurt them. All of them. But him - God, I wanted to kill him. And - Goddess, I did. I killed him, and I didn't care."  
  
She was so wrapped up in her story that she didn't feel Draco come up behind her until he felt his arms go around her waist. "Willow, please - "  
  
"No!" She pulled out of his grasp. "Don't you understand? I just want to be alone!" Draco fell to the floor as if he was pushed - but she hadn't even touched him.  
  
"Oh God. Oh God." Willow knelt by him. "I - oh - are you okay?"  
  
He groaned as he sat up. "I'm alright."  
  
"I'm - oh my God - I didn't mean to - I just - see? I lose control and I end up hurting the people I love and then I - "  
  
"You what?"  
  
Willow blinked. "And then I - "  
  
"No, before that. What did you say?"  
  
"I lose control?"  
  
Draco stepped over to her. "After that."  
  
"I - I hurt people I love." She looked up at him.  
  
"People you love." He brushed a piece of hair out of her face. "Does that include me?"  
  
Willow nodded up at him. "Yes. It does. I love you. But - you probably think I'm crazy."  
  
"Why would I think you were crazy?"  
  
"Besides the out of control, black magic thing?"  
  
"Like I haven't seen that before. You forget who you're talking to." Draco pulled his left arm from around her waist and rolled up the sleeve of his shirt, revealing the Dark Mark. "See? You're not the only one who's given in one time or another."  
  
Willow traced the scar with a fingertip, not much unlike she had seen Hermione do in her dream, his shared memory. "No. I guess I'm not. Maybe that's why we connect. Why I'm reaching out to you. Why you can see right through me." She cupped his cheek with her hand. "Why I love you."  
  
"I'm pretty sure that's why I love you, Willow Rosenberg."  
  
Willow looked into his eyes. "You do?"  
  
Draco nodded. "Yeah." He leaned down and crushed her lips against his.  
  
"Those two seem to have hit it off quite well." Ron mused wryly, watching the two from afar.  
  
"They're alike. In more ways then you know." Hermione said, watching them with a small smile.  
  
"Oh, and you do?" Lavender asked, crossing her arms.  
  
Hermione looked at her. "More then anyone will ever understand." She shrugged. "I'll never tell. So don't even ask."  
  
Harry squeezed Hermione's hand. "So, what do we do now?"  
  
"The Aurors are going to take care of the damages, clean it up, make it look like nothing happened. We should get Willow and her friends home." Lavender said, glancing over at Buffy and Xander.  
  
"Well, one thing's for sure." Ron said grimly.  
  
"What's that?" Hermione asked.  
  
"From what I just saw - we certainly don't need to protect her from anything anymore."  
  
Harry just nodded and Hermione sighed, running a hand through her hair. 


	5. Pains of the Past

A/N: After the first scene in the house, things get a little weird. Everything is happening at the same time, so I put the room at the top. Did you really think they would sleep? Not likely.  
  
There is an overabundance of my favorite quotes in this chapter. At the end, I'll tell you what they are and who/where they're from.  
  
~* Looking In *~  
  
Part Five - Pains of the Past  
  
~* All the times that I cried  
  
All this wasting  
  
It's all inside  
  
And I feel all this pain  
  
Stuffed it down  
  
It's back again  
  
And I lie here in bed  
  
All alone  
  
I can't help what I feel  
  
Tomorrow will be okay *~  
  
By the time they got back to the house, it was long after dark. Angel was down at the high school as soon as the sun set, followed by Giles and Dawn. Kennedy stayed home with the other potentials. She was a little freaked out by the fact that she wasn't one of them anymore.  
  
She *was* the slayer.  
  
And that was a little more then she could grasp at the moment.  
  
There was a quick memorial service for Faith. Her gravesite was right across from Anya's. It was amazing how fast they could get a headstone engraved.  
  
Then again, this was Sunnydale - home of mysterious disappearances and eternally long obituaries.  
  
The group trudged into the livingroom, absolutely exhausted. The girls were camped out, ready for the night. They didn't say a word.  
  
"What's all this? What are you all doing down here?"  
  
"We thought you might want to be alone in your rooms upstairs, so we all cleared out. We'll be okay." Kennedy said, trying to crack a smile. "Promise."  
  
Buffy went over to Kennedy and hugged her, sending a prayer to any deity who would listen that she would never have to go through anything like this. "Thank you."  
  
"No problem."  
  
"Can I stay down here?" Dawn asked tentatively.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
Dawn nodded. "I got used to having so many people around that I don't think I'd be able to sleep alone. And then someone else can have my room."  
  
"Okay, um - why doesn't Giles take the guest room he's had, and then Xander can stay in Dawn's room." Willow said, practically falling asleep on her feet. She was leaning on Draco for support.  
  
"I can camp out on the floor in someone else's room." Xander said. "Let Harry and Hermione take the bed."  
  
"You can camp out in my room. Angel and I can take the bed. We've managed the past few nights."  
  
"What about Ron and Lavender?" Harry asked.  
  
Buffy ran a frustrated hand through her hair. "I have no idea. My brain isn't quite functioning on the higher level at the moment."  
  
"If they want, they can have the bed in my room." Willow said sighing. "I'll take the floor."  
  
"No, we're okay on the floor." Lavender said.  
  
"They can stay in Dawn's room with us so you can keep the bed." Hermione said with a small smile.  
  
Willow smiled at her. She knew that Hermione knew more then she was letting on, and in a way, she was grateful. "Thank you."  
  
Willow headed up the stairs, her arm around Draco's waist for support. The rest followed suit shortly.  
  
In fifteen minutes - midnight - the house was overcome with an unusual, eerie silence. They were all asleep -  
  
Or were they?  
  
~*~*Livingroom*~*~  
  
Dawn rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. She sighed and sat up, hearing someone sniffle.  
  
"Kennedy? Is that you?"  
  
Another sniffle. "It's me. Come up on the couch - I don't want to wake anyone."  
  
Dawn got up and Kennedy shifted so she could sit down and get under the blanket. She didn't say anything. She knew that Kennedy would speak in her own time.  
  
"I'm not ready to be the slayer. I mean, I just - " She sighed. "I was so relieved when it was all over. Faith was still alive, and that meant that none of us could be called. But now - I don't know what to do."  
  
"You know what Buffy was like when she first found out? She was terrified. She wasn't trained, she wasn't prepared. She was this stuck-up, scared little girl from upper-class Los Angeles who just wanted to go to prom with the most popular jock and have the nicest, most expensive dress, and look great in it. Then this was dumped on her. And her whole life changed. She wasn't ready either." Dawn took Kennedy's hand. "But she learned to be."  
  
"It's hard to believe that Buffy was ever a normal girl."  
  
"Sooner or later, it'll be hard to believe you were ever a normal girl."  
  
"It's already hard to believe that. At one point, I thought vampires were a thing of fairy tales and Anne Rice novels. Demons were something to read about in classical mythology, and the mouth of hell? That was reserved for religious fanatics. Now - it's all different. Nothing's the same. Everything's changed. And I'm just as scared as I was before."  
  
"Fear is a great motivator, Kennedy. Maybe you can use it to your advantage." Dawn smiled and hopped down off the couch. She crawled into her sleeping bag and tried to go to sleep. Kennedy sat in silence on the couch looking out the window.  
  
~*~*Giles' Room*~*~  
  
"Giles? Are you awake?"  
  
Giles looked over at the door, a bit confused. "Yes. Come in."  
  
Xander opened the door, sleeping bag slung over his arm, two pillows in his hand. "Would you mind - can I camp out here? The lovebirds were making googly eyes and I wanted to leave them alone. But if you don't want company - "  
  
"No." Giles cleared his throat. "No - uh - feel free to make yourself comfortable."  
  
Xander threw his things down on the floor and sat down. "So, you couldn't sleep either huh?"  
  
"Not a wink."  
  
"Are you tired?"  
  
"Exhausted to the bone."  
  
"I feel ya." They lapsed into silence. "Does it ever get easier?" Xander asked.  
  
"Does what?"  
  
"Growing up. Life. Living in this god-forsaken town. There was a time when I would have given anything to live anywhere else. But now - I just can't seem to get away. My life is here, end of discussion. And I could deal with that. But things are just - "  
  
"Just too much? I know. We're all grieving, and it just seems to get worse before it gets any better."  
  
"The fact of the matter is - this is no longer Buffy's fight. It used to be, but now - that 'I'm the Chosen One, I'm the Only One.' thing. It's all just a load of bullshit. One big lie."  
  
"The greater the lie, the more people will believe it, Xander."  
  
Xander shook his head. "Not me. Not anymore."  
  
Giles sighed and sat pondering in silence, while Xander attempted to fall asleep, banishing all thoughts "growing up" from his mind.  
  
~*~*Buffy's Room*~*~  
  
"I think we scared Xander away." Buffy said, a small smile coming over her face.  
  
"I think I can agree with that. He mumbled something about 'googly eyes' on the way out." Angel said, pulling Buffy into his arms.  
  
"I wasn't making googly eyes. I was making - okay, maybe I was. But I'm aloud. When was the last time we were together for - what is it now? Three months?"  
  
"I believe it was before you graduated from high school. And I've been around."  
  
"For days at a time. Once or twice, and it's always hiding, brooding, 'you're in grave danger so I'm going to help and then leave' or - or just because."  
  
"See?" Angel kissed the top of her head. "I am around just because."  
  
Buffy looked down at her hands. "Only when I'm grieving. Honestly - when was the last time you saw me happy?"  
  
"This morning. When you saw Willow happy - you were happy. Glowing almost. I miss that Buffy. Where'd she go?"  
  
Buffy sighed and shifted. "Somewhere between consoling Xander and convincing the girls that things weren't going to hell again, I think it died. The happiness, I mean. I got my yearly glimpse of it. It was there, I waved hello - and then it said 'Adios.'"  
  
"I doubt things happened like that Buffy."  
  
"No. I think I might have been 'Ciao.' Or 'Aloha' maybe."  
  
"Buffy." Buffy looked up at him. "You'll get your happy moment."  
  
Buffy had tears in her eyes. "I can't. Because true happiness is with you. And that's beyond my reach."  
  
Angel pulled her to him. "I'm sorry Buffy. I wish I could give you the happy fairytale ending you deserve."  
  
Buffy sighed and gave him a weak smile. "I'm beginning to believe something I read once. Whether family or soul mate, if two people love each other, there can be no happy ending to it."  
  
"Love is like war, Buffy - easy to begin, but very hard to stop."  
  
Buffy leaned up to him. "Who said we had to stop?"  
  
Angel leaned down and his lips captured hers in a soft, sweet kiss. She pulled away and smiled, her first genuine smile in months. "I love you - even if I never get my happy ending."  
  
Angel cupped her cheek in his hand. "That's good to know - because I love you too."  
  
Buffy closed her eyes and nestled into his arms, her head in the crook of his neck. Within moments, she was asleep, Angel watching over her like he always had been.  
  
~* ~*Dawn's Room*~*~  
  
Hermione and Harry were lying awake wordlessly. Harry had his arm around her waist and was rubbing his hand up and down her arm. She sighed.  
  
"Ron, I know you're not asleep down there."  
  
Ron groaned and sat up, careful not to wake Lavender. "Did you *really*expect me to be?"  
  
"No."  
  
Ron stood up and sat down on the edge of the bed. "So - what do you think of this place?"  
  
Hermione gave a small laugh. "Honestly? Definitely somewhere I can scratch off my list of 'Places I Want to Visit Before I Die if it Doesn't Kill Me First.'" She sighed. "I mean, the people are nice, but they're sort of closed off."  
  
"They have to be, 'Mione. They've seen evil in its prime so many times - they can't help but make you feel like you're on the outside."  
  
"We've faced evil." Ron said.  
  
"It's not the same. The evil we face - it's always the same, in one way or another. It always has been, and always will be tied to Voldemort. This evil? It's always different, but always out to get them." Harry sighed. "It never ends, does it?"  
  
"Why should it?" Hermione said, as if ending were a bad thing.  
  
"Because after all of this - they deserve a happy ending." Harry said firmly.  
  
Hermione slipped her arms around him. "There are no happy endings. Because nothing ends."  
  
They lapsed into yet another awkward silence.  
  
~*~*Willow's Room*~*~  
  
Willow was sitting on the windowsill looking out at the stars. Draco was watching her from the bed, wanting to give her space, but wanting to wrap her in his arms and never let go all at the same time. She looked so fragile and lonely sitting there, but even now, he could feel a faint aura of power radiating off of her. Her eyes had faded to green hours ago, but they still held that distant, haunted look he glimpsed only momentarily the night before, and had seen too much of since that afternoon.  
  
The way she was out by the high school - furious, but completely worn down by a sadness that was supposed to have gone away long ago - it made his own memories come back to haunt him. All that pain he had stuffed down in the depths of his mind was rising to the surface at an alarming rate, and he felt almost suffocated by it. He needed some time alone with himself, even if it was only these few minutes, to sort things out.  
  
He was going to have to leave tomorrow, and, though he didn't want to admit it, he knew that she wasn't going to come with him. It would have been so much easier to stop this in the beginning and not get involved at all. But it's easier to resist at the beginning than at the end, because there was no way he could turn back now - he loved her. And in his heart, he knew he couldn't have turned away even if he wanted to.  
  
The wind rustled the curtains and Willow shivered, pulling down the window. She was still looking out as she said, "You know, you can come over here. I promise not to push you away again."  
  
That was all the invitation he needed. Draco went over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist. She was content with just leaning her back into his chest and closing her eyes, listening to the sound of their breathing.  
  
Willow broke the silence. "You're going to go away, aren't you?" It was more of a statement then a question, and Draco sighed, not wanting to answer it.  
  
"Lucius is dead. Unless someone else rises to power, you're safe. Sirius wants us back by tomorrow night."  
  
"Don't skirt around the question. Just answer it. I'm not glass - I'm not going to break."  
  
Draco leaned his head on top of hers. "Yes. I'm leaving tomorrow." Willow nodded, forcing back the tears that threatened to fall. "But I want you to come with me."  
  
At this unexpected proclamation, Willow spun around. "What? You - what?"  
  
"I want you to come with me. Willow - I love you. And, I want to be with you. So I want you to come with me. Please say you will."  
  
Willow pulled away. "I - I can't. I mean - I can't just leave them. They need me now, I - It's too fast. With everything, I just - I can't Draco."  
  
"But you want to."  
  
"More then anything! But - my life, for now, is here. Just like your life is away from here."  
  
Draco ran a hand through his hair and sat down on the bed. "What are we going to do then?"  
  
Willow shrugged. "We can visit each other. Just until things die down. Draco, I need you to understand." She knelt down and took his hands in hers. "If things were different. If things weren't so absolutely crazy around here, and they were back to at least a relative normal, I would go with you in a heartbeat. But I just lost five of my friends. I watched them all die - and I need to be with the people who are grieving with me. I can't lose control again. I know that sounds selfish, and I know you must hate me, and I can't say I blame you, but - I'm needed here right now. Do you understand?"  
  
Draco nodded. "But there's one thing you're wrong about. I don't hate you Willow. I couldn't, not even if I tried. You understand me better then anyone else has, and as much as I want to be with you, you're right - you need to be here now. They need you to be here."  
  
Willow got up and sat on the bed. She leaned over and kissed him softly, though the kiss was quickly growing with passion. She pulled away for a moment to look into his eyes. Green met gray, and suddenly, she just knew -  
  
Tomorrow's going to be okay.  
  
"I love you." She said, putting her palm over his heart.  
  
"I love you too."  
  
She looked up at him, eyes gleaming with lust and love, pain and tears. "Then show me."  
  
A/N: The promised quotes :)  
  
"Fear is a great motivator, Amanda." - Nolan in "Simply Irresistible"  
  
"The greater the lie, the more people will believe it." - Adolph Hitler  
  
"If two people love each other, there can be no happy ending to it." - Ernest Hemmingway  
  
"Love is like war: easy to begin, but very hard to stop." - H.L. Mencken  
  
"There are no happy endings. Because nothing ends." - Shmendrick the wizard in "The Last Unicorn" (movie)  
  
"It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end." - Leonardo da Vinci 


	6. Battle Wounds

~* Looking In *~  
  
Part Six - Battle Wounds  
  
~* I'm on the outside  
  
I'm looking in  
  
I can see through you  
  
I see your true colors  
  
Inside you're ugly  
  
Ugly like me  
  
I can see through you  
  
I see to the real you *~  
  
Willow awoke to someone pacing around the room. She opened one eye and saw Draco shuffling through a bunch of papers, reading something and shaking his head. She contented herself with just watching him. He was top-less, which made him look even more amazing then she thought he could.  
  
After watching him for a few minutes, she sighed and let him know that she was awake.  
  
Draco stopped pacing and looked over at her, smiling. He gave her a quick kiss. "Good morning."  
  
"Yes, it is." Willow said smiling. She sat up and gestured to the papers in his hand. "What's that?"  
  
"This? Oh." Draco grimaced. "Reports about what happened yesterday. Casualties, survivors, whole nine yards."  
  
"What's that mean, anyway? Whole nine yards. Nine yards of what?" Draco laughed, and Willow pouted. "You're laughing at me."  
  
"I'm sorry," he said, still laughing, "it's just - you're cute when you ramble."  
  
Willow blushed. "I guess I should take that as a compliment." She kissed him soundly.  
  
"Yes, you should." He murmured against her lips.  
  
After a few minutes, Draco pulled away and brushed a stray hair behind her ear. "I should go see if Hermione is awake."  
  
He slipped off of the bed and put on a tee shirt as she asked. "Why? What's up?"  
  
"I want her to try some healing charms on Buffy. It may not completely heal her, but it'll speed things up a bit."  
  
Willow brightened. "Really?"  
  
"Really."  
  
Draco was about to walk out when Willow got up and pulled him to her, kissing him like she would never kiss anyone else ever again. "I love you." She said, her forehead resting against his.  
  
Draco kissed her softly. "I love you too."  
  
Willow pulled away and ushered him out the door. As he walked down the hall, Willow sighed.  
  
This was going to be one of the hardest goodbyes she'd ever have to face.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Hermione was awake long before everyone else. She was content with just looking out the window, and was even happier when she felt Harry's arms go around her at sunrise. They sat in silence, as they often did. They didn't have to say a word, but so much was said in the few hours they sat together, watching the day begin.  
  
There were two short knocks at the door and Hermione went to open it. "Draco. What's wrong? Is everything alright?"  
  
Draco nodded. "Everything's fine. But I need to ask you a favor."  
  
"Sure - name it."  
  
Draco noticed the door to Buffy's room open slightly. She was obviously letting everyone know she was awake. He looked back to Hermione. "The slayer - Buffy. She's really beat up, and I was hoping that maybe you could help her a little bit."  
  
"Healing charms?" Harry asked, coming up behind Hermione. "Are you sure she'll want the help?"  
  
"It won't hurt to offer." Draco said.  
  
Hermione eyed Harry and nodded. "Sure. I'll go take a look. Harry, will you hand me my - "  
  
"Ten steps ahead of you." Harry said, handing Hermione a small bag that doubled as a magical first aid kit of sorts.  
  
Hermione took the bag and gave Harry a quick peck. "I'll be back."  
  
"Don't stay too long." Harry said, grinning.  
  
"Oh, I'll take good care of her Potter. Let her go already." Draco said rolling his eyes. Harry glared.  
  
"That's enough out of you." Hermione said, giving Draco a slight shove down the hall. "Walk." The two of them walked down the hall.  
  
Draco knocked on Buffy's door. "Buffy?"  
  
Buffy looked up from the bed at Angel. He shrugged and said, "Come in."  
  
Hermione and Draco stepped in and closed the door behind them. Hermione stood a bit awkwardly. Draco's idea was a good one, but how exactly do you go about asking someone if you can help heal their battle wounds *nicely*?  
  
"Hermione, Draco." Buffy said nodding. "Is something wrong?"  
  
"No, everything's fine. Actually - well, this is going to sound like an odd question but," Hermione bit her lip. 'How the hell do I ask this?'  
  
"But - what?" Buffy asked.  
  
Draco answered for her. "This was my idea, Buffy, so maybe I can help 'Mione. When you were in Willow's room the other night, I couldn't help but notice the - umm -"  
  
"Cuts and bruises aplenty?" Buffy offered.  
  
"Exactly. And - well, I was wondering if - "  
  
"I can help you." Hermione said, as if stating the obvious.  
  
Buffy was stunned. "How?"  
  
"Healing magic." Angel said, smiling. He had caught on while Hermione was still trying to figure out how to ask.  
  
"Exactly. It was Draco's idea, and when he asked if I could help - well, of course I said yes. There are some potions and a few charms that I could do and it may not get rid of everything, but it should help a great deal." Hermione smiled. "That is, if you'll let me."  
  
Buffy looked at Angel, as if asking his opinion. "I'd say yes. What could it hurt?"  
  
Buffy nodded. "If it'll put me back in action faster and get me out of this bed - fire away. Do what you want."  
  
Hermione beamed and put her bag down on the bed. "Alright boys. Out."  
  
Draco mock saluted and walked out, although Angel took his time walking out the door. When they were both outside, Hermione waved her wand and the door shut and locked behind them.  
  
"There. Now - Draco said something about a bunch of cuts on your back."  
  
Buffy nodded and Hermione handed her a pillow. Buffy knew what it was for - she pulled her tee-shirt over her head and held the pillow to her chest, covering up. "Most of them have closed - I think. But it's still pretty painful."  
  
Hermione sucked in her breath. "Ouch. Draco wasn't kidding." She shook her head and opened up the bag, taking out a few bottles of - something - and mixing them together. An odd smell began to fill the room - it wasn't anything disgusting, but it wasn't quite pleasant either.  
  
There was a knock on the door, and Willow came in the room. Hermione didn't even have to ask how she got in - a good Alohomora from Draco could have opened the door pretty easily.  
  
"How's it going?" Willow said, walking over to the bed.  
  
"It's - "Buffy flinched. "Burning."  
  
"Sorry!" Hermione said, giving Buffy a sympathetic look. "I forgot that stung."  
  
"Don't worry about it. A little stinging is better then an aching pain."  
  
The three women lapsed into silence. Hermione finished up and gave Willow a little smile. "Okay, you can put your shirt back on. Keep the bandages on for two hours and then have someone take them off."  
  
Buffy nodded and slipped her shirt back over her head. Hermione tended to most of the other wounds. The swelling at Buffy's hip went down almost immediately, and Hermione re-wrapped her wrist. Her leg, which was less painful to begin with, was completely healed.  
  
"Stay off that leg for a few hours." Hermione instructed. "By tonight, you should be fine, and by tomorrow, you should be back to a somewhat normal exercise routine, nothing too strenuous until next week. Okay?"  
  
"Thanks." Was all Buffy could manage. She was amazed at how blissfully ache- free she felt.  
  
It was like heaven.  
  
"So, how long until you leave?" Willow asked.  
  
"Don't you mean, 'how long until Draco leaves?'" Hermione asked, packing up her bag.  
  
Willow blushed and Buffy grinned. "C'mon Willow admit it - you're a love sick puppy."  
  
If possible, Willow blushed even further, but played along. "Oh, like you're not love sick over Angel. Xander had to leave the room and you were just looking at him!"  
  
"Looking, but not touching!"  
  
"Please, like you wouldn't touch if you could." Willow quipped. Hermione was enjoying watching the banter go back and forth. Buffy shrugged but licked her lips.  
  
"Buffy!" Willow squealed and threw a pillow at her, which Buffy effectively caught.  
  
"Oh come on, I'm sure Buffy wouldn't do anything you and Draco haven't already done." Hermione said grinning.  
  
"'Mione, I am shocked. I am truly appalled," Buffy paused. "That I didn't think of that astounding retort sooner."  
  
The three started laughing and the door opened, revealing Harry, Draco, and Angel standing impatiently in the doorway.  
  
"Problem gentlemen?" Hermione asked, eyes gleaming.  
  
"Yes - you." Draco said, pulling Willow into his arms.  
  
Hermione feigned shock. "That hurt." She sniffled. "I think I might cry."  
  
Draco rolled his eyes. "Over-sensitive know-it-all."  
  
"Overly conceited bastard." Hermione shot back.  
  
"I can just feel the love in this room." Buffy said smiling. "Really - it's overwhelming."  
  
"Oh, shut up slayer." Willow said, throwing another pillow at her.  
  
Buffy threw it back. "Witch!"  
  
Willow threw it back, and it turned into an all-out war. After a few minutes, Willow surrendered, laughing.  
  
"Hermione!" Lavender's voice called down the hall.  
  
Hermione was laughing with the rest of them. "Yeah!" She called, still giggling.  
  
Lavender and Ron came into the room. "We just got an owl from Sirius." Lavender said, holding up a piece of parchment. "It's time to go."  
  
Willow eyed Draco and sighed, giving him a sad half-smile.  
  
It was time to say goodbye.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Willow and Draco stood off to the side from the rest of the group. They were going to apparate home, and the Summer's yard seemed to be the easiest and least public place to do so.  
  
After saying goodbye to everyone else, Willow and Draco walked off alone. They wanted to say their goodbyes, but without the large group of on- lookers. Willow looked over, where Hermione was waiting with Harry patiently for them to finish. She smiled at her. Willow found she couldn't smile back.  
  
Draco turned Willow's face towards him and leaned in to kiss her. It wasn't as probing as some of his kisses had been - it was gentle, and lasted longer then either of them had meant it to.  
  
Willow pulled away and leaned her forehead against his. "Don't say goodbye, okay? This isn't goodbye - I'm going to come see you as soon as I can."  
  
Draco smiled at her. "You read my mind. I was going to tell you the same thing."  
  
Willow pulled away and looked into his eyes, seeing them full of love -  
  
For her.  
  
Willow kissed him again and whispered, "I love you."  
  
Draco kissed her back, pulling her as close to him as he possibly could. "I love you too."  
  
Draco pulled away and kissed her forehead. Willow watched as Draco walked over to Harry and apparated away. She saw him mouth something as he left, but didn't quite catch it until he was gone and it was too late to respond. She would see him again, 'soon' she vowed silently, and she would be able to tell him that she understood - and that she felt the same way.  
  
"I see you." He said, the meaning of the words not lost on her. Draco *had* seen her, for who she was -  
  
Just Willow.  
  
And that was enough.  
  
~* End *~ 


End file.
